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February 1, 2020 by Rhonda King

“How are you…really?”


“So how are you?”, I hear this older lady ask a young widow. Silence..”I mean how are you…really?” I want to grab the young widow up to me and whisk her away from this well meaning lady, but I cannot. I stand there and say a silent prayer that God continues to give the young lady strength. More strength than she even thinks is possible, because some days-there is really no answer to that question “HOW ARE YOU?”

Over my many years as a funeral director, whether I am helping a family plan funeral arrangements, meeting a wife for the first time as her husband lies near, dying with cancer or working a funeral, I hear the same comments and questions. Often people want to reach out to help the sad and grieving; they fumble with what to say, muttering pleasantries as they look down or other times, they ask THE “How are you really” question to an overwhelmed loved one that has no clue how to answer that question.

My thoughts as a funeral services professional? Talk less and love more. You don’t always have to speak, to ask questions that have no adequate answer to comfort a hurting loved one or friend. You can simply reach out and hug them, squeeze their hand and look them in the eye. Let them know that you see those tears falling and you are right there beside them reassuring them that you won’t ever be that far away. Letting one person’s soul speak to another is something that makes us uniquely human, do it more and do it often, especially when dealing with a grieving friend.

Filed Under: Blog, Blog, News Tagged With: bereaved, funeral counseling, grief

January 28, 2020 by Rhonda King

Why is the funeral industry secretive?

I have gotten asked this a lot over the years. As a Funeral Director, people would often say, “Why all the secrecy, what all are you doing?” I rarely answered in any detailed manner because the truth is, it is not that we are secretive, we are reverent. Death is sacred, it is so, because death gives everything in life that we hold dear meaning. Without death, one could not possibly understand how precious each moment is.

Most don’t like to think about the finite meaning of life, but we are reminded of this fact daily. Death is a time of transition, not secrecy. But what we do not understand fully is often frightening. I have been honored to walk through and literally “survive” the passing of loved ones with my families over the years.

The biggest secret, may be how woven those families become in our being, as Funeral Directors we hold sacred all that has been entrusted to us.

The unknown can be intimidating, let us help you navigate

Filed Under: Blog, Blog, News

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